When Gentlemen Used Calling Cards...

19th Century Calling Card Etiquette... The giving and receiving of calling cards developed a very elaborate set of rituals and rules that every gentleman tried to master. While one’s modern sensibilities might find these rigid formalities laughable, I’ve got to say there’s a certain appeal to it. Far more dignified than poking someone on Facebook, wouldn’t you say?. Just in case you step through a time warp and land in the 19th century, here’s your calling card etiquette survival guide. On a first visit to a household, a gentleman gave one card to each lady of the house. A married man had a medium sized card, while an unmarried man had a smaller card. Men’s cards were always smaller than women’s. When calling upon the lady of the house, if she was not home, but her daughter was, the gentleman sent in his card and departed, as it was not usual for a young lady to receive calls from a gentleman unless they were very intimate friends. Special significance was given to the turning down of the card’s corners: A visit in person (as opposed to being sent by a servant): the right hand upper corner A congratulatory visit: the left hand upper corner A condolence visit: the left hand lower corner Taking leave (if you were going on a long trip): right hand lower corner If there were two of more ladies in the household, the gentleman turned down a corner of the card to indicate that the call was designed for the whole family. ___ From "AOM," by Brett & Kate Mc Kay.